Morris Dancing

In the last few days I have twice endured Morris dancing. I have never particularly enjoyed the spectacle of gentlemen wearing short trousers and bells prancing about with hankies or hitting sticks together, all to the accompaniment of that most horrendous of instruments - the accordion. No, I'm not a fan. I've never really seen the point of it. I know it's a refined version of old fertility dances common in agrarian cultures etc but still... it seems a bit daft! It has also always made me feel uncomfortable. I thought this was because if you take away the bells, sticks, hankies, hats and garlands then you're left with how most men look when dancing. But yesterday I realised what actually made me uncomfortable. Most men engaged in any form of dancing look vaguely idiotic (apart from the gifted few and those who have shelled out for lessons) but they do it in the, often misplaced, hope of attracting members of the opposite sex. A mating ritual if you will. But there is absolutely no way on our beautiful, resplendent planet, that any female can find Morris dancers even remotely sexy/ appealing/ likely to be good mates. Therefore they must do it simply because they enjoy it (and the beer). Now, how scary is that? They live amongst us.....